the waiting is the hardest part

This morning at Colossae, we opened worship with the song Everlasting God, written by Brenton Brown (and recorded by a whole host of other folks, including my favorite version by Chris Tomlin). It is a simple song based on Isaiah 40:28-31. Since I first heard the song several years ago, it has been one of my favorites. The song opens with the powerfully repetitious stanza: "Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord. We will wait upon the Lord. We will wait upon the Lord." These words are a beautiful reminder or our need to wait patiently on the One who sustains us.

And yet today, I found it nearly impossible to sing. Not because I doubt the truth that these words express, but because of the sheer difficulty of doing what they say. I often lack the patience needed to wait, for anything. Still, some things are worth waiting for, even if it is difficult. As Tom Petty once sang, "the waiting is the hardest part." 
 
"Everlasting God" (just so you can hear the song)
Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord
We will wait upon the Lord
We will wait upon the Lord

Our God, You reign forever
Our hope, our Strong Deliverer
You are the everlasting God
The everlasting God
You do not faint
You won't grow weary

Our God, You reign forever
Our hope, our Strong Deliverer
You are the everlasting God
The everlasting God
You do not faint
You won't grow weary

You're the defender of the weak
You comfort those in need
You lift us up on wings like eagles

pruning has its place

Gardening is one of my favorite things. When the sun shines bright and life is good, gardening allows me to get outside, work with my hands, and tend to a little slice of God's remarkable creation that I have been entrusted with. And when life is tough, amidst those moments when storm clouds gather without warning and unleash their fury, gardening still allows me these same opportunities while also giving me a productive escape and time to process. (Note to self: Blog more about gardening...)

Last Saturday, my parents drove out to Newberg to help me with some yard work. I needed time to think and also a heady dose of the love and support that come from ones family. When they arrived we jumped right into the primary task at hand, pruning my plum tree. This is a task that we had tackled once before, in the spring of 2008. It was a necessity then, just as it was this year. With sucker branches exploding high into the air and the sheer density of the branches in the interior, the tree needed some attention. And with our unseasonably warm weather, tiny tight buds were forming, accentuating the need to complete the task soon.

Since moving in two and half years ago, my plum tree has steadily produced an incredible amount of delicious fruit each year. I've made plum butter (family Christmas presents in 2008) and plum crisps, while also giving away, freezing and eating a ridiculous number of fresh plums. In spite of this impressive annual yield, I know that by pruning it back, the tree will actually become more fruitful. For sure, this year's crop will be smaller in quantity, but the fruit itself should be noticeably better - larger, juicier, and more flavorful. In time, the branches that we pruned, or cut out all together, will grow back stronger and more fruitful.

For three hours my dad and I pruned sucker branches and thinned the tree's core, thoughtfully considering the tree's ideal shape and ability to produce fruit before each cut. And for three hours, my mom stood with hand clippers cutting the branches into smaller pieces for the yard debris container. For all her efforts, she even got a blister on her hand. (Is there any question where I learned to demonstrate my love for others by serving them?) In the end, the tree looked better than when we started, but it was also rather evident that a significant portion of it, even that which was fruitful, had been cut out.

The next morning, I sat alone at church distracted by life and completely oblivious to Chuck's message. I knew that I was supposed to be there, despite my own objections to going. For lack of attention, and perhaps to appear somewhat engaged, I picked up my Bible and, without thinking, opened it to John 15. The chapter begins like this:

"I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful." 

When I opened the blinds on my bedroom window Monday morning, the sharp rays of the sun had just crested the house behind me and was illuminating the plum tree. What I saw was remarkable. In just over a day, a handful of those tiny tight buds adorning the pruned branches had fully blossomed into clean white flowers. The new growth had already begun, and the promise of a more fruitful tree was already being realized.

I can't help but think that this is the reason that I spent three hours pruning on Saturday (despite having other more pressing projects), or that I was at church on Sunday (despite my fervent objections). God spoke to me in terms that I could understand, even if I don't yet know how this truth will play out in my life. As we walk through our lives, God will sever things from us, some of which bears incredibly delightful fruit. It is not an easy process, and it can certainly involve significant sadness, anger, and fear, but he is merely pruning us so that we may "be even more fruitful." This may come in the strengthening of other fruit in our lives, or it may come as that which was pruned from us grows back even stronger to produce an even more abundant fruit than before. And perhaps both of these options can happen concurrently. I see a glimmer of hope in this truth.

more lessons from Oswald

"The things we try to avoid and fight against - tribulation, suffering, and persecution - are the very things that produce abundant joy in us. 'We are more than conquerors through Him' 'in all these things'; not in spite of them, but in the midst of them. A saint doesn't know the joy of the Lord in spite of tribulation, but because of it."   -Oswald Chambers

Today's devotion from My Utmost For His Highest is titled "The Source of Abundant Joy" and is based on Paul's words in Romans 8. This familiar passage contains amazing truth of God's love. Two particular verses stood out this morning:

28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

32 "He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all - how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?"

These two verses vibrantly express the source of our abundant joy as believers in Christ. I know this to be true, in my mind. I wish my heart and my soul could understand and accept it as well. Because, I could use some joy right now; even if it doesn't come in abundance. 

lessons from Oswald

Lately, I've been trying to read Oswald Chambers' classic devotional My Utmost For His Highest on a more frequent basis. While his thoughts are pretty much right on from day to day, every so often it seems that his words, originally published in 1935, were written with me in mind for that specific day. Today's short devotion was one of them. I hope that it encourages you as it did me...

Taking the Next Step
"...in much patience, in tribulations, in needs, in distresses" (2 Corinthians 6:4)

"When you have no vision from God, no enthusiasm left in your life, and no one watching and encouraging you, it requires the grace of Almighty God to take the next step in your devotion to Him, in the reading and studying of His Word, in your family life, or in your duty to Him. It takes much more of the grace of God, and a much greater awareness of drawing upon Him, to take that next step, than it does to preach the Gospel.

"Every Christian must experience the essence of the incarnation by bringing the next step down into flesh-and-blood reality and by working it out with his hands. We lost interest and give up when we have no vision, no encouragement, and no improvement, but only experience our everyday life with it trivial tasks. The thing that really testifies for God and for people of God in the long run is steady perseverance, even when the work cannot be seen by others And the only way to live an undefeated life is to live looking to God. Ask God to keep the eyes of your spirit open to the risen Christ, and it will be impossible for drudgery to discourage you. Never allow yourself to think that some tasks are beneath your dignity or too insignificant for you to do, and remind yourself of the example of Christ in John 13:1-17."

This also reminded me of a great quote by Martin Luther King, Jr. - "If a man is called to be a streetsweeper, he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say, here lived a great streetsweeper who did his job well."

why did the frog cross the road? (or frogger for grownups)

Tonight I became the person that I spent many hours trying to avoid as a child and I am still trying to figure out how that makes me feel.

As I drove the winding curves of Wilsonville Road with a steady rain falling amidst pockets of light fog, I noticed small frogs, illuminated by my headlights, jumping their way across the road. Surprisingly, this wasn't a localized occurrence. I saw frogs crossing the road all along the majority of the 11 mile stretch. Let me be clear, there were not thousands of them, at least not that I saw. But they were noticeable as they jumped out in front of my car from both sides of the road.

I soon realized that most likely some of them failed to reach the promised safety of the other side. And that's when it hit me - I was living out the old Atari video game Frogger that I loved as a child. The one exception was that instead of playing the role of the frog frantically dodging the onslaught of the coming traffic, I was the driver that made such crossings so treacherous.

I don't know how many of the frogs made it across tonight. I learned one important thing playing Frogger: if you're a frog trying to get to the other side, timing your first jump is the most critical to your survival. Hopefully real frogs understand this as well.

Now for some additional Frogger enjoyment (from Seinfeld):

reading what i want

For the past two and a half weeks I have been on a break from the Ed.D. Program at George Fox University. I find myself happily sandwiched between fall classes (Organizational Change & Decision Making and Foundational Perspectives on Ethics & Diversity) and those starting just over a week from now (Quanitiative Research Methods and Advancing the Organization: Fundraising). The challenge of tackling Miroslav Volf has passed and the anxiety of entering a doctoral level statistics course has yet to set in.

As with most school breaks, the thing I enjoy most is the lack of academic demands on my time. I feel as if I am granted a brief window to catch up on life, resume friendships that have gone untended, clean my house, and read whatever I want. The challenge for me is trying to fit it all in, especially the reading. There are so many books to read, good books. I have shelves of books that I haven't yet read, and the stores are chalk full of others that call out to me whenever I walk by.

And so, with the start of this break I made a conscious decision to read diligently (of which a positive side-effect has been that I've watched a lot less television). Again, my challenge is selecting what to read, or more specifically what to finish. Finally, months later finish Ruthless Trust by Brennan Manning? How about Peter Hessler's Oracle Bones: A Journey Between China's Past and Present a book that I started before going to China in July (photos coming if I can get iPhoto to export correctly)? The Servant by James Hunter? The World is Flat by Thomas Friedman? And just when I thought I had enough options to choose from - one of my classmates, Heather, gave me Bill Bryson's A Short History of Nearly Everything as a Christmas gift. I must say the title really piques my inquisitive side.

In the end, although reading bits and pieces of several of these, so far, I went back to a book that I first read about six years ago as part of a men's ministry program at Cornerstone Community Church in Simi Valley. The book is Point Man: How a Man Can Lead His Family by Steve Farrar. I'm not married, nor am I engaged, and I don't have any children. But I hope and pray that all of that is in my future. And if and when those dreams become reality, I want to be ready for the responsibility that comes along with the titles of husband and father.

Point Man does a relatively good job of laying out the need for husbands and fathers to step up to the plate in leading their families. He outlines the Biblical role and responsibility of a husband as a leader, while making crystal clear that this leadership is not to be abused. Men are called to lead their family as a servant, as one seeking the best for those they are leading. Our model is the sacrificial love of Christ.

The book includes some kitschy humor and several silly stories, but the overall point of the book is driven home quite well. I really recommend the book to men that seek to lead their families well, particularly from a Christian worldview.    

"lights please"

And with that, Linus begins his annual reminder of the meaning of Christmas. Many of us have watched A Charlie Brown Christmas for decades. It's a classic, and for some its one of the best parts of the holidays. And yet even in light of the truth that Brother Linus preaches, we continually find ways to make Christmas something else.



Despite our best efforts to take the focus off it's true meaning, that's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown.

Merry Christmas.